in terms of mean and nice

Because I am too pathetic to actually pursue my dreams very emphatically, I sometimes think of writing them out. Start a blog that pretends I am indeed an artist living in an RV, traveling with mild weather.

Here would my blog about a month in....

hrumph...(clears throat for story-telling)

February 16, 2010

The other day I parked at some old acquaintances' home in Birmingham, AL. I ran over their mailbox on the way in. How did this 1985 Winnebago make it all these years and all these miles without mishap? It's the same age as me, and though I've never broken a bone, I've had plenty of scrapes & bruises. I never thought I'd drive a semi, but I feel like this is one. Wish I had company on the road. But I'm not planning to be on the road all the time--it's the freedom to move, while keep my home with me, that I like. What an unheavenly idea! Anyway, about company. I've a mind to pick up random travelers. Oh dear, how quickly I'd become a traveling homeless shelter (lovely idea by itself) and lose my dream of a traveling studio.

They told me I could hang out here all winter if I want. Of course I won't, but it's nice to know I won't be overstaying my welcome if I hang around more than a couple weeks. I can't stay here too long because I know them. Even somewhat. I've got to get away from people I know, because of my insatiable sociability, even when I don't want to be social. I've got to go somewhere where everybody is mean! Mean and rude, and then I'll be like Fine, I'll stay in my trailer and you stay in yours, and I'll write some awesome stuff on my laptop, and I'll paint some awesome paintings, and I'll record some awesome music, but darnit, if you haven't picked up & left by then, I'll have found a way to give you some downhere music or something, and we'll be friends, and we'll

sit around the campfire, have a beer,

talk about the weather

look up at the stars.

you'll tell me horrible tales because you're mean, remember

and I'll say, that is horrible...

and I'll say, one time I had a nosebleed and I smeared it all over my face.

and you'll say something else horrible and I'll say, see the stars, how they praise God while you say such things.

Anyway I'm done inventing mean neighbors, I'm not very good at it. Mean people are the ones like me to just want to be alone to be creative, and that's not really mean but it seems like it. So those aren't the mean people. Mean people are the ones who hurt other people. I'd like to stay away from people like that. Mean person comes knocking on my RV door and I say "Who's there?"

"Mean person coming to hurt you."

"Go away, I am busy being creative. I don't have time for mean people like you unless you will be nice. See? I'm mean. You shouldn't have time for me!"

Anyway here I am in Birmingham. My habits are good so far, but I'm scared they'll slip any time. I made my bed, washed the dishes, and even did some dusting that didn't need done. Now that's good housekeeping if I ever heard of it. Blech.

I have maps on the wall. I have a map with stars for all the cities in the North America where I know people. It's pretty amazing. My downhomie friends make the constellation a bit starrier than it was before 2008.

I also have a phone list I made for my current city--B'ham-- of a bunch of venues where I can regularly seek piano gigs while I'm here. And of course a big calendar next to that list. Several gigs written in.

Biggest problem is this. this isn't big enough for an art studio. Shouldn't've compromised on space! I can't paint in cramped conditions. So the beginning premise of this venture is already doomed. Gah! And sound carries too easily out of the RV, which takes away my sense of privacy when I'm composing music. So I think I'll go home now to December, 2009, and call my friend like I need to, and unbuy this RV (heaven knows where I'll find another one like it), and put on my winter clothes again... and yeah, unvisit these people in B'ham that I haven't seen in like 10 years. Sorry, B'ham friends. Goodbye.